I’m not sure what to say after what happened yesterday. It seems selfish to talk about myself after the horror that people in Massachusetts have just experienced. I can tell you though that I definitely have some Post Traumatic Stress that bubbled up after hearing about it all. I felt numb — weepy — and anxiety ridden the rest of the day and am still feeling it this morning.
My heart breaks for the people directly affected –the eight year old boy. All I can think about is my own eight year old son and how horrific it must have been. His mom and sister are critically injured right now and how the actions of a bad, probably crazy person or persons has forever altered the country yet again. I can’t stop thinking about how they got up in the morning, just like every day they got up — did their morning routine, never in their mind that what happened could have happened. We are designed to go on living, not living our every moment in fear — and that’s probably for a good reason but then horrific things like this happen –senseless crimes, terrorist attacks, hateful actions occur that shake us all to the core. Throw off our stability, our sense of safety, our sense of well being and it takes time to regroup, recover and resume our lives.
Last night Hannah had trouble sleeping –she told me how scared she was and asked if things like that could happen here. I took the Fred Rogers approach – and it worked partly but she’s also very aware and sensitive and it didn’t completely settle her. So she slept with me last night –just to feel safe. And I was ok with that — I made sure to kiss my kiddos extra yesterday. Life is precious and short and can be taken from us at any moment.